I actually got into family law as a result of two abusive relationships, so I understand the ways it can shape you, affect your thinking, and alter the future. The first was a run-of-the-mill abusive boyfriend. I didn’t think about his behavior in those terms at the time, of course; it actually took me several years (and a new, healthy relationship – with my now husband) to help me gain that perspective and see all the problematic behaviors. By the time I was offered and ultimately accepted … [Read more...]
Virginia custody issues: when you suspect your child is being abused
I’m a mom, too, so I get it. Protecting those little people is literally the only job in the world that matters, and when you feel like the health, safety, and well being of your children is threatened – well, it’s understandable if it makes you feel a little crazy. When the health, safety, and well being of your children is threatened by your child’s father, it’s even worse. And it’s not uncommon at all! I’ve been around the block a few times now and seen a lot of different types of cases, … [Read more...]
Can my child’s other parent refuse to allow me to leave with the child?
Can my child’s other parent refuse to allow me to leave with our child? We get a lot of questions about what your child’s other parent can and can’t do as the situation moves towards a separation. I get it – it’s scary, it’s emotionally charged, and it can get ugly, really, really fast. There’s really nothing that pulls on our heartstrings quite as quickly and aggressively and viscerally as our children. We can’t help it. It’s biological. But what do you do? You can’t stay where you are … [Read more...]
Can I move out of the house?
Can I move out of the house? Even though most people these days live with their soon-to-be ex husband for a period of time during their legal separation, for most people it’s not a whole lot of fun. For others, it’s impossible. Depending on the specific factors that brought your marriage to this point, living together may be more or less feasible in some cases than others. (In some, it can be downright unsafe!) But probably you’ve heard about desertion as grounds for divorce – and desertion … [Read more...]
Women Facing Virginia Custody Cases
When it comes to facing a custody case, you probably feel like a fish out of water. And, honestly, if you don’t feel that way, you probably should. I don’t say that to scare you – I don’t ever want to just scare anybody – but only to make you aware that things that you may take for granted are often different in custody cases. You have to remember that in litigated cases everywhere, it’s judges – some of the oldest and most conservative members of our population, especially in Virginia – who … [Read more...]
Dealing with narcissism in your Virginia divorce
Dealing with narcissism in your Virginia divorce Narcissistic husbands are tricky. (And trust me, you’re nowhere near the only one dealing with issues stemming from a marriage with a narcissist!) But recognizing your husband’s condition is so helpful, even though it might not feel that way to you right this minute. Knowing how he operates, how he makes you feel, and how he thinks, can give you a real edge in your divorce or custody case. What does a narcissist do? Narcissists make their … [Read more...]
Ballpark Virginia Custody Case Fees
Everyone (and I do mean everyone) wants us to give them just a “ballpark” figure for how much their case might cost. In some cases, that’s an easier thing to do than others. But, even so, costs can be a difficult thing to estimate. There are a lot of variables involved. There are a lot of things that, try as I might, I just can’t control. And there are some things that, even if an issue may seem simple up front, that doesn’t necessarily mean things will resolve quickly, easily, and … [Read more...]
Virginia Custody Cases Where There is Abuse
As a mother, you would do anything for your children. It’s a cliché and yet, at the same time, it’s also incredibly true. It’s something I’ve witnessed time and time again in my practice, talking to moms who are in the middle of fighting for, or are preparing to fight for, custody of their children. In most cases, though that protective momma bear comes out regardless, custody is a relatively simple thing to determine. Both mom and dad are reasonably good parents, though they were (for … [Read more...]
