When coparents are petty I heard a new one the other day. It doesn’t happen all that often, at this stage in the game, but yesterday it did. I was talking to a woman who told me that her child’s father, after their divorce, tried to one-up her in every single way imaginable – even with the tooth fairy! My son is only two, so I don’t have to deal with the whole tooth fairy thing yet. It’s my understanding, though, that the going rate for teeth has increased since my childhood. When I was a … [Read more...]
Drug or Alcohol Use in My Virginia Custody Case
Drug or Alcohol Use and My Virginia Custody Case Drug or alcohol use can pose problems in a Virginia child custody case, as you can probably pretty well imagine. Judges – who are notoriously conservative, especially in Virginia, and especially when it comes to things like drug use – don’t like it. In Virginia (as in pretty much everywhere), custody cases always comes down to what’s in the best interests of the child. Is living with (or riding in a car with) a person with substance abuse issues … [Read more...]
How to Use Text Messages as Evidence in Divorce
Text messages are valuable evidence in a lot of cases. We need access to this information all the time, and we often request that our clients provide us with their text message history. Our client’s husbands also often provide text messages or emails as proof of some contention or another. When that happens, almost without exception, our clients say things like, “That’s not true!” or “That was taken out of context of the larger conversation.” Sometimes, too, if you read just a bit further, … [Read more...]
Will I have to give up on things I want in my Virginia divorce?
In many ways, contested or uncontested, your divorce is a negotiation. In most cases, regardless of whether you initially file on fault, your divorce will ultimately be settled. That’s not a dig; in fact, it’s an ideal situation. Rather than leaving it up to a judge, you and your husband can reach an agreement about how your assets and liabilities will be divided. Taking your divorce out of the hands of a judge serves a couple different (but important) purposes. For one thing, it allows … [Read more...]
Inconvenient Forum: Divorce Filed Far Away
Technically, any court anywhere in Virginia has jurisdiction over your divorce. So, even if you live in Virginia Beach, your husband could file for divorce in Fairfax, if he wanted to—just to be difficult. Usually it doesn’t happen just because someone wants to be difficult (because he’d have to drive to and from Fairfax for court dates, too, and his convenience matters to him); usually, it really just happens because the parties live in two different places, and the party who files first files … [Read more...]
I have court coming up. Do I need a Virginia attorney?
When it comes to having to go to court, it’s a little too easy to be the ostrich, burying your head in the sand. Most of the time, though, that response won’t help you at all; in fact, depending on the type of case you’re facing, you could really be hurting yourself. If you don’t take action relatively quickly after realizing that you have a court date looming on the horizon, you’re probably cheating yourself out of incredibly valuable prep time beforehand. Whether or not you choose to hire an … [Read more...]
Divorce Hampton
Generally speaking, you file for divorce in the city where you and your husband last lived together as husband and wife. Though technically any court in Virginia can grant your divorce, you may find that this court (the one in the city where you last lived as husband and wife) is the most helpful to you. Other courts will sometimes refuse to accept divorces (particularly contested ones) from people who don’t live in their jurisdiction; in other cases, even if the court itself allows you to file … [Read more...]
How do I know if my divorce will go to court?
I spend a lot of time talking about how to get the best divorce. Most of the time, I have to say that the way to get the best divorce is to negotiate a signed separation agreement. There are a lot of reasons why you might like to do things this way. For one thing, it saves a ton of money (which you can use to get that fresh start you’ve imagined, put in your kid’s college fund, invest, or safely save away in your retirement accounts). For another, it takes the kids and the families into account. … [Read more...]
