Should I sign this separation agreement? Every so often I hear from a woman who, panicked, tells me she has to have a separation agreement reviewed TODAY. She has to sign it right now, or there’ll be dire consequences. It’s an emergency! It has to be done now! I hate these conversations for a lot of reasons, but, first and foremost, because I believe this is when really bad decisions with really long reaching consequences are made. Separation agreements are never something that should be … [Read more...]
Porn Addiction and Divorce
Porn Addiction and Divorce Addiction is a big buzzword these days, and people can suffer from addictions to all sorts of things. The typical addictions that tend to spring to mind are generally drug or alcohol related – and there’s no doubt we see our fair share of those. But there are other, more modern, addictions that we’re seeing lately with more and more frequency, and among those is the porn addiction. Now, I’m not a therapist, and I’m not here to debate the merits or demerits of a … [Read more...]
How do I prove we’ve been separated for a year?
Most people are aware that they’ll have to prove, at the end of a year, that they’ve been separated in order to get a divorce. What they don’t know, though, is how all of that is accomplished at the end of the process. We get lots of questions about how things are proven and what needs to happen at the end of the one year of separation. It’s actually a really good question, too, especially because it can be confusing, and things can be different depending on the type of divorce you’ve pursued … [Read more...]
Why file on fault in Virginia divorce
I spend a lot of time preaching about separation agreements. Obviously--see here, here, and here, for more information. I talk a lot about how useful they are, how much control they give parties over the way their assets will be divided, and the benefits of spending less on attorney’s fees (so you have more for your happily ever after). But a separation agreement isn’t possible for everyone, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. When I talk about the benefits of separation agreements, … [Read more...]
Alcoholism in Divorce and Custody Cases
Alcoholism is a widespread issue in the United States, and it’s no small wonder that we see it pretty often in divorce and custody cases. Whether it’s your alleged alcoholism, or whether you’re worrying about your husband’s consumption of alcoholic beverages (and, of course, whether it’s a divorce or a custody case we’re talking about), there are some things you should know as you prepare to face a family law case in the Virginia courts. Alcoholism in Divorce Cases The first thing you should … [Read more...]
Does adultery matter?
For most women, finding out that their husbands have committed adultery is devastating. For him to throw away your life together, after however many years, is a terrible and overwhelming feeling. I get it, and yet, at the same time, my goal is always to make sure that my clients have up to date, reliable, specific information about how the law in Virginia actually works, so that they can make informed decisions about their future. In my experience, I’ve noticed that lots of people have … [Read more...]
Divorce after an open marriage
Hey, I'm not here to judge. If I've learned anything from all my years working as a divorce and custody attorney, it's that families come in all shapes and sizes, and marriages don't necessarily conform to convention. If your family is a little on the unusual side, that's okay. In fact, anything is okay. You don't have to do things the same way as everyone else if that's not what works for you. I certainly won't judge, and you can pretty much guarantee that I've heard worse. If you've had an … [Read more...]
Virginia Divorce Procedure
Though there are definitely similarities between divorces, there are lots of differences, too. In fact, if you’re wondering about what is involved in divorce procedure, you’re not alone. And, the truth is, it’s not always a very simple answer! Divorce procedure is different depending on the type of divorce you’re pursuing. For our purposes, at least as far as it relates to divorce procedures, you can have two types of divorce: contested or uncontested. If it’s contested, meaning that you and … [Read more...]
Fault Based Grounds for Divorce
Most people, at some point or other, really want to explore all of their options when it comes to divorce. For most people, too, that starts with carefully considering fault based grounds. They’re definitely appealing. For a lot of people, selecting from among the fault based grounds of divorce feels almost compulsory, if those grounds exist. For others, being able to use fault based grounds provides a level of justification. It’s almost a way of saying, “See? The law recognizes why I can’t … [Read more...]
Desertion in Virginia
In Virginia, there are both fault and no fault grounds for divorce. Many people believe, for whatever reason, that if they have fault grounds they should absolutely use them. The way the law is written, if a party has made what they deem a “negative non-monetary contribution” to the marriage, the judge may consider it when determining how all the assets and liabilities will be divided. One of the things that lawyers are always quick to point out when they’re reading the law is that “may” is a … [Read more...]
