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Personality Disorders and Divorce

It’s probably safe to say that, in divorce, most rational people end up settling. In terms of the financial outlay, it makes sense. Not just in the sense of what it costs to hire an attorney – which can be substantial – but in terms of the money involved in the marriage itself. You probably…

After Your Abusive Marriage Ends

  Being in an abusive relationship can cause you to question your own sense of reality. You live under an altered version of reality – your abuser’s reality – for so long that it causes you to lose touch of the real world, and how other people behave within it. Coming out from a long…

If we don’t agree, can we still get a separation agreement?

Most people have a lot of questions about the divorce process – even if they understand the basics. After all, there’s a lot that is really fact specific, and it can be hard to apply a general principle to a specific situation. Even if you can sort of guess what the answer might be, you…

Why do women initiate Virginia divorce first?

Statistically speaking, women file divorce first. In roughly two thirds of divorce cases, women file first. When the woman in question is college educated, that number jumps up to 90%. That’s a lot of divorces, right? Meanwhile, their bumbling husbands report feeling surprised – after all, they thought everything was ‘just fine’. I’ve written on…

Attorney’s Fees in Virginia Divorce

Divorce is a trauma. It’s a trauma for you, and, in many cases, it’s a trauma for your children, too. But, then again, probably many of the events leading up to your divorce and/or custody case were pretty traumatic, too. It’s not like you just showed up at a divorce attorney’s office unscathed, and suddenly…

Trauma Responses to Divorce and Custody Cases

Divorce is a trauma. It’s a trauma for you, and, in many cases, it’s a trauma for your children, too. But, then again, probably many of the events leading up to your divorce and/or custody case were pretty traumatic, too. It’s not like you just showed up at a divorce attorney’s office unscathed, and suddenly…

Why don’t you just divorce him?

  I’ve been guilty of it, too, in the past. I’ve asked a friend, who confided in me about the misery involved in her relationship, why she stays. Why she doesn’t just go, because doesn’t she know she deserves better? These days, I try not to. Because I know it won’t help. Because I know…

Is he a narcissist? Common Themes in Virginia Divorce

I was reading a quote the other day that said that the best thing you can do for a narcissist is to give him a child. That was it – that was the end of the quote – but it really did get me thinking. It probably is the best thing you can do, because…

Divorce from an Abuser

I actually got into family law as a result of two abusive relationships, so I understand the ways it can shape you, affect your thinking, and alter the future. The first was a run-of-the-mill abusive boyfriend. I didn’t think about his behavior in those terms at the time, of course; it actually took me several…

Narcissists and the Drama Triangle in Virginia Divorce

I recently read a really interesting article that really helps to explain some of the ways a narcissistic husband will try to manipulate a situation to their advantage. For their spouse, the behavior is toxic, damaging, and, oftentimes, really difficult to separate themselves from. Partially, it’s just the way we’re built. You know, psychologically. They…