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Divorce Coach or Therapist?

If you’re hoping to navigate a divorce while suffering the least amount of stress possible, you’re smart.  Though I think we can all recognize the difficulty, few people give that much thought to how they can divorce better.  When it comes down to it, there ARE choices you can make that will minimize the suffering…

Mental Illness, Suicide, Divorce – and Self Help

One of the things that I find the most interesting about suicide, and the people who either commit it or don’t, is that it’s often a question of opportunity. For someone like, say, Sylvia Plath, who died of carbon monoxide poisoning after sticking her head in the oven, it was an opportunity. In that time,…

Divorce and Suicide

  There are just some conversations that are difficult to have, and this one is a good example. I talk about divorce every single day, and, somehow, that never really gets to me. I have a fundamental belief that there’s no reason to stay in an unsuccessful, unhappy, unfulfilling, and/or abusive marriage. That, for me,…

Is he a narcissist? Common Themes in Virginia Divorce

I was reading a quote the other day that said that the best thing you can do for a narcissist is to give him a child. That was it – that was the end of the quote – but it really did get me thinking. It probably is the best thing you can do, because…

Avoiding a Messy Virginia Divorce

  In a divorce, a lot comes down to the decisions that you make at the beginning of the process. I feel like I say this a lot, but I say it because it’s true. There is almost always a tense, emotional, complicated time between when you decide to formally separate and end your marriage,…

How to Prepare for a Family Law Initial Consultation

I got this question for the first time the other day – how do I prepare for an initial consultation – and I realized it’s something that I hadn’t specifically written on before. I’ve written about whether you can bring someone with you, what documents you should bring, what to expect, and so on, but…

Should my child be in therapy during my custody case?

OCTOBER 26, 2020 BY KATIE CARTER   Contested cases are hard on everyone involved. I work with women, so my perspective is often that of the wife and mother. I actually rarely see children. It’s really not appropriate; for me to do my job, I have to have conversations with my client that could be harmful for…

Do Virginia Family Courts Get It Right?

Recently, on Facebook, as I mindlessly scrolled (come on, you know you do it, too) I saw a video that showed a child fighting a visitation exchange. The video alleged that the child was resisting going to spend time with her mother, because her mother’s boyfriend abused her. The end of it – the moral,…

Postpartum Depression and Divorce

Bringing a baby into the world is, simultaneously, one of the most wonderful and most terrifying things that can happen to a woman. Having done it twice now myself – both c-sections, the first one an emergency – I can attest to that, for sure. I don’t think I fully appreciated the changes that motherhood…

Divorce from an Abuser

I actually got into family law as a result of two abusive relationships, so I understand the ways it can shape you, affect your thinking, and alter the future. The first was a run-of-the-mill abusive boyfriend. I didn’t think about his behavior in those terms at the time, of course; it actually took me several…