Adultery, Spousal Support, and Custody We talked Monday about adultery, and the difference between filing a divorce (which is a civil case) using adultery as your grounds and an actual criminal prosecution on adultery (which is a level IV misdemeanor in Virginia). The purpose of that article was to alleviate concerns I see around adultery cases. I received a call just the other day from a woman who was worrying about the potential impact to her career stemming from a divorce action that … [Read more...]
Staying in an Unhappy Marriage for the Kids
Staying in an Unhappy Marriage For the Kids I get it. Your kids are your life, and there’s nothing you wouldn’t do for them, including (but not limited to) staying in your unhappy marriage. But what’s the right choice? Do you stay, knowing that it’s entirely possible that your kids are aware of more tension than you even realize? Or do you go, knowing that you’ll forever change their family dynamic and force them to adjust to a new – potentially harmful – normal? No one can make that … [Read more...]
Custody and Visitation on Halloween
Custody and Visitation on Halloween Holidays are hard. They’re always hard. I field questions about holidays probably almost every single day. Generally speaking, holidays are alternated between parents. We alternate legal holidays – the Fourth of July, Memorial Day, Labor Day, and Thanksgiving. We usually alternate Christmas and Spring Break, too, to varying degrees, both to reflect the need for both parents to be able to spend time with the children during the holidays, but also to reflect … [Read more...]
Custody and Child Support of Older Teenagers
Custody and Child Support of Older Teenagers Under the law, a child magically becomes an adult on their 18th birthday. But what does that mean, and how does it impact custody and visitation? When you have an older teenaged child, what options do you have? What does the court allow? These are all good questions, and, if you’re the parent of an older child, you’ve probably found that a lot of the information related to custody and visitation relates to much younger children. You’re probably … [Read more...]
Financial Abuse in Virginia Divorce
Financial Abuse in Virginia Divorce Financial abuse is a major issue in many divorce cases, especially when there’s a big disparity in income between the parties. For two spouses with a roughly similar income (even if that income isn’t super large), the act of separating and setting up separate houses, though difficult, isn’t nearly as complicated or as consuming as in a case where the parties are on a total different financial playing field. Unfortunately for many women who find themselves … [Read more...]
Petitions to Modify Virginia Child Custody
Petitions to Modify Virginia Child Custody As you probably are already aware, once you have a child with someone, they never really go away. In a divorce or a breakup where there are no children, the parties are free to go their own separate ways and never see each other again. It’s not only desirable but encouraged. There’s no reason for them to have any future contact. A divorce is seamless; it completely, totally, and permanently separates the two former partners. With kids, it just … [Read more...]
Temporary Agreements in Divorce and Custody
Temporary Agreements in Divorce and Custody Temporary Agreements are complicated issues in divorce and custody cases. If your husband (or child’s father) proposes one, you should proceed with extreme caution. That being said, we often use temporary agreements for all sorts of reasons. I’m working on one right now for a client who needs custody and spousal support determined on a temporary basis. It happens fairly frequently that, though we can reach an agreement about some issues, we can’t … [Read more...]
Virginia Custody Issues: He won’t let me see the kids
He won’t let me see the kids To cut to the chase and state the obvious as simply as possible: if there’s no custody order in place (as in, you and your child’s father have never (1) been to court to let a judge determine custody, and (2) you’ve never signed an agreement related to custody and visitation), both you and your child’s father have equal and complete rights to your children. You can take them when and where you want, including but not limited to Timbuktu. Though your child’s … [Read more...]
Women Facing Virginia Custody Cases
When it comes to facing a custody case, you probably feel like a fish out of water. And, honestly, if you don’t feel that way, you probably should. I don’t say that to scare you – I don’t ever want to just scare anybody – but only to make you aware that things that you may take for granted are often different in custody cases. You have to remember that in litigated cases everywhere, it’s judges – some of the oldest and most conservative members of our population, especially in Virginia – who … [Read more...]
Could I have to pay HIM spousal support?
Could I have to pay HIM spousal support? Spousal support is one of those areas where tensions tend to run high. No one – husbands and wives included – want to have to pay it. But for the lesser earning spouse (and I can tell you, I’ve represented the lesser earning spouse many, many times), spousal support is sometimes the only real lifeline that they have. I’m going to make some generalizations here. (Though, of course, in my experience, these have almost always held true.) In cases where … [Read more...]
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