Does my teenager have to go to visitation with his father? I hate these cases. Really, really hate them. I see moms with some frequency who come in and tell me that they were trying not to make any future issues with custody and visitation, but that their child asked them to intervene for one reason or another. Usually, these children are older teenagers (15+) and they’ve asked, for whatever reason, not to be forced to go to visitation with their fathers. The moms, more often than not, feel … [Read more...]
How child support is calculated: Part 2
On Monday, we started talking about child support, and how it’s calculated. It’s actually pretty straightforward, though the child support guideline figures can vary dramatically, which makes it a refreshing area of law. We ran the guidelines a bunch of different ways, using the same income figures, to show you the difference between one and two children, and primary physical and shared physical custody. It can make a big difference! There are lots of issues that come up when it … [Read more...]
How is Virginia child support calculated?
How is Virginia child support calculated? Child support is one of those refreshing areas of law where there are black and white, hard and fast answers. As long as we know what numbers – regarding your income and your child’s father’s income, daycare expenses, health care expenses, etc – we can quickly and easily compute child support. From that point, it doesn’t matter whether your attorney runs the guidelines, his attorney runs the guidelines, or the judge runs the guidelines – the number … [Read more...]
Self Defeating Things Divorcing Women Say
Self Defeating Things Divorcing Women Say I hear you; this is hard. Divorce is scary. It’s overwhelming. It’s so wide-reaching, too! Buying a house or car is expensive, but a divorce divides EVERYTHING you’ve earned, purchased, or acquired (including debt, including calculating support, and including custody and visitation) during the course of your entire marriage. If that’s daunting, well, that’s a pretty normal thing to be feeling. You’re not alone, and it’s normal if you feel like it’s … [Read more...]
What happens in an uncontested divorce?
What happens in an uncontested divorce? Basically, in Virginia, you can get divorced in one of two ways. Either you guys duke it all out in front of a judge, who ultimately rules on how everything will get divided in your case, or, alternatively, you and your husband reach an agreement regarding how everything will be divided. In the latter case – the one where you guys reach an agreement – your divorce will be uncontested, meaning that the judge does not have to render any decisions, since … [Read more...]
Will getting a job impact my alimony?
Will getting a job impact my alimony? I feel you – I’m a person who likes to take action, too. If you’re separating or headed quickly that direction, you’re probably wondering what changes you’ll need to make to your day to day in order to be able to afford the kind of lifestyle to which you have grown accustomed. In most cases, it’s not about you, really – it’s more about your children, or being able to afford to stay in the same home, or something like that. It’s scary to think of all the … [Read more...]
Will my husband return my children?
Will my husband return my children? There’s nothing worse in a contested custody case between the time when the parents separate or otherwise break up and when custody is determined by the judge (or agreed upon by the parties). It’s a legal gray area. Technically, as parents of the child, both of you have the legal right to do whatever you’d like with your children – move, travel, whatever. That’s not a very good feeling if your child’s father is unpredictable or threatening, and if you … [Read more...]
What is a Guardian ad litem?
What is a Guardian ad litem? Nothing strikes fear in the mind and soul of a mom more than the threat of a custody case – especially when dad is unreasonable, unwilling to compromise, or somehow an inappropriate caregiver. It happens a lot. Even dads who were never formerly involved – or who did some terrible things – can petition the court for custody and visitation. Dads can even petition the court for visitation of a child who is a breastfeeding infant. Really, any dad, at any time, in any … [Read more...]
Will a Guardian ad litem be involved in my custody case?
Will a Guardian ad litem be involved in my custody case? In a case where custody is litigated in court, there are at least two attorneys. Your attorney, who represents you – and has a duty to represent your cause zealously; and his attorney, who, of course, has the same obligations to your husband that your attorney does to you. It doesn’t matter whether your dad or your great uncle or your ex husband is footing the bill for your attorney, your attorney represents you and only you. So, … [Read more...]
Can my child’s other parent refuse to allow me to leave with the child?
Can my child’s other parent refuse to allow me to leave with our child? We get a lot of questions about what your child’s other parent can and can’t do as the situation moves towards a separation. I get it – it’s scary, it’s emotionally charged, and it can get ugly, really, really fast. There’s really nothing that pulls on our heartstrings quite as quickly and aggressively and viscerally as our children. We can’t help it. It’s biological. But what do you do? You can’t stay where you are … [Read more...]
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