Dealing with Dysregulated Kids After Dad’s Parenting Time

A common theme in coparenting is how difficult it is for kids and coparents to transition between each parent’s separate parenting time.  This is probably especially true in the early stages of coparenting – though it generally settles down for many families – but, in some cases, visitation exchanges are always disruptive. Some kids (like...

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Not all Narcissists Make Divorce Awful

I know, I know.  If you’re married to a narcissist – whether diagnosed or undiagnosed – you KNOW how miserable they can make life.  And, if left to their own devices, they’d probably love to make divorce difficult, too. After all, if there’s one thing a narcissist (or a high conflict person or an abusive...

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Coparenting Issues: Spanking

  Question: I admit – I sometimes ‘bop’ my children on the bottom when they aren’t listening.  My child’s father, who has been largely uninvolved, has told my children that this is child abuse, and says he will call CPS if he hears that it ever happens again.  Because of this, my children are being...

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Coparenting Issues: Disparaging Comments

  One very common provision in custody agreements (or separation agreements, if your custody case is part of a larger divorce action) is that neither party will make disparaging comments about the child’s other parent in the presence or hearing of the child. Sounds easy, right?   Don’t talk badly about each other.  Full stop. It’s...

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Negotiating an Agreement v. Litigation

Not every case can be negotiated – this we all know.  But, in an ideal world, you and your soon-to-be ex would negotiate, because this is going to give you the most control over how your case will be resolved. No matter what issues are involved, you have essentially two options: agree, or go to...

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Custody cases are some of the most dramatic, contentious, and stressful cases.  I’ve written on this before, and I’ll say it again: Virginia is NOT one of the states in this country that mandates 50/50 custody as a starting point. In Virginia, we use the ‘best interests of the child’ factors, established by statute, as...

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Virginia Custody Agreements

The whole point of a legal contract – any contract – is to establish specific terms governing a certain situation.  When we’re talking about divorce, we use a separation agreement.  When it comes to custody and visitation, we’re either talking about an initial determination or a modification, but the same goal exists: to agree, rather...

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Grandparent visitation is often a hot button issue – especially when parents separate and/or divorce.  In general, grandparents don’t have a lot of rights to custody and visitation of minor children which, in my opinion, is as it should be.  The parents are the ones who are tasked with making the day to day decisions...

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