Child Custody Lawyer Near Me

Child custody cases can result from a number of situations. Though divorce is a common source, you may need to work with our child custody lawyer near me law firm to modify an existing agreement, or in the process of establishing paternity and an agreement for unmarried parents. Regardless of what brings you to us, we know that these are conversations you likely never wanted to have, even if you know it is in the best interest of you and your kids. 

At Hofheimer Family Law Firm, we only represent women, making us familiar with the unique challenges mothers face when navigating the family court system in custody cases. Our Virginia Beach family law attorneys are here to fight for you and the well-being of your children by helping you build a case based on relevant facts and your strengths as a parent.

Hofheimer Family Law Firm Knows Women 

Back in 1991, our founder, Charlie Hofheimer, noticed the lack of appropriate resources available to women regarding divorce, and he decided to step in to help fill that gap. It began when he partnered with a local group offering divorce seminars for women. Thirty-four years later, Hofheimer Family Law Firm has a team of family law and child custody attorneys providing various support services to women seeking divorce and custody support. 

Our firm offers networking, educational, and community-building events. Among these include Girls Night Out, which offers a chance for women working through their divorce or custody case to connect with other women in similar positions, network, and feel a sense of community. Our team also offers monthly seminars to our divorce clients and the Virginia Custody Boot Camp for Moms.

Being a mom can be lonely, and getting divorced or worried about the future of your children is terrifying. When you choose Hofheimer Family Law Firm, you choose not only excellent legal representation but also a community of women who understand what you are dealing with and have a chance to feel seen and understood. 

The Basics of Virginia Child Custody Cases

It can easily become overwhelming as you begin to navigate a Hampton Roads custody case. Determining what a certain type of visitation schedule or custody arrangement means, what you can do with it, and how it is determined can make you feel like you are no longer in charge of your child’s well-being. 

In some ways, this is true. The judge can make the final order for who your children spend time with, but understanding the process is the first step to actively engaging in the custody plan and preparing yourself and your kids for what will happen.

Your Child’s Best Interests

Virginia family courts are always expected to operate with the child’s best interest as a focal point for decision-making. Part of this process may mean your child is assigned a Guardian Ad Litem(GAL). This is someone appointed by the judge to assist in assessing the situation and determining the child’s needs. 

A Guardian Ad Litem may interview relevant parties, review documentation, and speak with the child before writing a report to submit to the judge. Some of these considerations can include access to resources like their current school, friends, medical providers, and other sources of community or family support. 

Physical Custody 

In a child custody case, physical custody refers to who is exercising parenting time, or with whom the child is physically. In many cases, parents are awarded joint physical custody, meaning each parent is responsible for providing physical care for the child. However, depending on the situation, you may choose to petition for primary custody, which would provide the bulk of parenting time to you while offering visitation to the other parent.

Legal Custody

Legal custody often refers to decision-making power and allocates the rights and responsibilities of making educational, religious, medical, and daily life decisions regarding the care and upbringing of your child. 

Common Custody Formats 

You may hear terms like joint custody or sole custody. Many moms may think that, in the absence of evidence that they are abusing their children, they will receive sole custody of their kids, but this is not the case. While the judge is required to consider all forms of custody arrangements, it is widely accepted that children have better long-term outcomes when they can retain contact and relationships with both parents following a divorce. 

Joint Custody

This means that some form of joint custody is common. This may mean the children spend one week with mom and one with dad, or the school year with mom and school breaks with dad. It may even mean one night a week and weekends with dad and the rest of the time with mom. 

Concerns About Your Custody Agreement

The specific structure of your agreement is highly dependent on your specific situation. Concerns surrounding the unknown of your court-ordered custody visitation arrangements are valid. No mother wants to think they are in a position to spend half of their time away from their kids, so it is worth discussing any concerns with a Virginia Beach child custody lawyer near you.

As moms, our first priority is always the safety of our kids, and when we are worried that safety is threatened, our instinct is to take them back to the den and not let the threat near. If you think the other parent is facilitating an unsafe environment for your children, do not refuse a visitation, but call your child custody attorney and the police if it is an immediate threat.

Though we cannot say for sure what will happen, if you have concerns, we can work with you to identify evidence that supports your claims and ask the judge to consider minimal, supervised, or no visitation to protect the well-being of your kids. 

Considerations of Child Custody 

Determining a custody agreement can seem endless. In most situations where parents can agree to something on their own and it seems to be done in good faith and aligns with the child’s best interest, the judge will likely accept the agreement. Even when parents cannot agree, the judge will attempt to order a plan in accordance with 20-124.3 of the Code of Virginia. This requires the custody agreement to consider several factors in the decision. 

Parental Input 

Parents are the ones doing the work of parenting, and you usually know your family best, so this input is valuable. Additionally, it is rarely to the child’s benefit to try to force a disinterested parent into parenting. So the wants and needs of the parents can be vital to an effective plan. 

Parental Capacity

Your desire to parent is important, but the ability to parent is equally, if not more, important. This is often a concern we see in mothers who have taken the brunt of the parenting duties for a husband who never changed a diaper or cannot seem to engage their child at an age-appropriate level. 

Parenting capacity may be questioned when one parent struggles with active substance use or fails to adequately manage a significant mental illness. It may also include emotionally immature parents who are simply unable to meet the emotional needs of their children.

Parent-Child Relationship 

Concerns regarding the established relationship with the husband are also something we commonly help moms navigate. Oftentimes, fathers who have not been as active as we’d like can step up and be better parents to their kids when they have their own parenting time. 

Other times, you may have real concerns that your child will be uncomfortable or unhappy with having time with the other parent due to an existing negative relationship. These concerns are, again, valid, and are often something we voice during negotiations. This may not mean the other parent does not get visitation, but it may mean they start slowly. 

Parents’ Willingness to Co-parent

Effective coparenting is critical to better outcomes for your children. Therefore, the judge will likely consider each parent’s willingness to work together to meet their children’s needs. They often notice when one parent is genuinely trying to facilitate a healthy relationship between their child and the other parent. They will also take notice when a parent works against the other.

Child’s Reasonable Preference 

Children need the support and structure of an adult. That is part of why they still need parents to live with. However, we know that this decision impacts them. Therefore, they should be given the space to share preferences on where they want to live. We avoid bringing kids to testify in court for obvious reasons, but their wishes are often communicated through the GAL.

Is the judge likely to grant custody to mom because the 16-year-old says they can do whatever they want? Probably not unless other factors make her a more appropriate parent. However, is it relevant to consider that the 16-year-old has a close and loving relationship with their mom, and wants to spend more time living there? Absolutely. 

History of Family Violence or Abuse

Finally, a family history of domestic violence or abuse in the home will have a significant impact on how custody is handled. If there is evidence of abuse, the court has a duty to protect the child from it. This may mean they have supervised visits initially, or no visits. 

Winning Your Virginia Beach Child Custody Case

Anxiety over the outcome of your case is normal. Thankfully, there are several things you can do to support a win in your custody case, and it starts with education. You need to know the general process for how custody is decided, and what kind of reasonable requests you have for the outcome. 

When I say reasonable requests, I mean requesting a visitation schedule that works for you and your child, not necessarily ‘sole custody’ because he cheated on you and you don’t want him around your kids. Though it may be tempting to demand everything and negotiate down, this can present you in a bad light and harm your case more than help. 

When you present your case, you want to use evidence that addresses those criteria considered in your child’s best interest. In most cases, you want to provide evidence and documentation of why you are in your child’s best interest and less of why the other parent is not. 

Additionally, presentation matters. It is crucial that you try to avoid poor or inappropriate behavior in court. This can include being sloppily dressed, overly emotional, or provocative. Remember that your turn to talk will come. The best thing you can do is stay appropriate and regulated. After all, well-regulated parents are healthier parents. 

The Danger of Going Without a Child Custody Order

In cases of divorce where children are involved, a custody order is often required, but what if you have never been married, or you have just separated? You may be tempted to avoid the formality of a custody order and assume you will work it out as situations arise. However, this can leave you in a vulnerable situation that we often call ‘the mom’s downfall.”

You may go into the situation to be reasonable and figure things out. However, it only takes a couple of times to say no to Dad when he asks for time with the kids before he’s taking you to court with accusations of keeping the kids from him. Our child custody attorneys in Virginia Beach know that parental alienation is taken seriously, and not an accusation you want to defend.

Trusted Virginia Beach Child Custody Lawyer Near Me Law Firm

If you are facing a custody battle, whether due to divorce or establishing an agreement with the child’s father to whom you are not married, you need the support of aggressive and capable child custody lawyers. With Hofheimer Family Law Firm, that is what you get. 

Our firm has been an established part of the Hampton Roads community for over 30 years, and our commitment to supporting women through this process has been proven for the better part of thirty years. Our firm offers case consultations to help you get started. Contact us today to schedule online and discuss the details of your unique family situation.