Dating After Divorce

Posted on Apr 27, 2010 by Hofheimer Family Law

If you have gone through a difficult divorce and decided to re-enter the dating world, you may have realized that new relationships have their own share of challenges. There are many factors that come into play when dating after a divorce; these include your ex-husband, the "stigma" of already having children, and dating other parents.

How Dating Can Affect Your Ex-Husband and Children

You may think that you and your ex have no lingering issues or attachments, but this is not always the case. Your ex may respond emotionally to the prospect of you dating another man. This response may be directed at you or your children. If your new relationship is getting serious, you'll most likely encounter important events like your children's birthday parties, etc. where the three of you will all be together. It's important that you and your ex talk about these events beforehand and make equal efforts to be civil in front of your children.

Be sure to tell your children that you are not attempting to replace their father and make sure to always encourage your children to talk to you about their feelings concerning your new relationships. Addressing these feelings openly from the get-go can make them much easier to handle than allowing a situation to spiral out-of-control by sweeping it under the rug.

Being a Dating Parent and Dating Other Parents

There has always been something of a social stigma on dating with children. However, this stigma is lessening in modern society as rates of divorced parents are ever-rising. If someone chooses not to date you because you are a parent, just be glad you did not have to get into a relationship to discover this shallowness.

Many parents looking to date other parents make a major mistake right off the bat: they set their kids up for a play-date while the parents date. Keeping your kids out of the relationship until you are sure the relationship is really going somewhere is the smartest choice. This is because children can get very hurt when relationships end, especially if they were fantasizing about their new best friend also being their new step brother or sister.

Our Virginia divorce attorneys care about your rights, the welfare and happiness of your children, and your financial security. Let us use our unique experience and legal expertise to help you focus on your goals for the future and your family. To learn more about Virginia divorce, request a FREE copy of our guide, What Every Virginia Woman Should Know About Divorce, or reserve your seat at our monthly divorce seminar – 757-425-5200.