Do You Like Watching Movies? If You Do, Watch ‘Em More in Virginia Beach!!
Have you ever watched a movie and literally escaped from your life for two hours? Have you ever left a movie theater feeling more confident or inspired? Have you ever watched a movie in your den and felt energized? You can’t go to sleep…just yet…until you come down from the high of the movie.
I recently watched a movie in my den by myself and when the movie was over I was energized. I forgot the trials, the tribulations and the stress of my own life for a while. The bottom line is this…we all have stress. If you have kids, you know stress. If you are going through a divorce, you have stress. If you are contemplating divorce, you have stress. If your relationships have not evolved the way you thought they would, and you are worried about this effect on your kids, you have stress. I hate to say this, but no matter what, we have stress.
As I thought about this after the movie, I realized a basic principle. We are all fragile. Let me say that again, “we – are – all – fragile.”
Human beings are an interesting sort. A sort we actually are not. What makes one person act the way they do, is completely counterintuitive to the way a similarly situated other person might act. Whether you are a big tough 6’5 husband who is scorned by his wife and lashes out in ways that makes him look little boy, or you are a 4’11 wife who throws verbal daggers at her husband with the venom of a python but inside is physically fearful, the basic principle prevails. We are all fragile and we all want the same basic things.
I wonder why some people want or need drama. I think it’s because they want to feel loved. They create the drama to test the other person. It is an internal thing – and a need or desire to validate the relationship or more importantly, a need to validate the feelings of the other person.
You may be wondering why a divorce attorney is thinking about these things. Quite frankly, you would be right to ask. But sometimes the answers aren’t always legal. Sometimes you need to talk to someone – and you need to validate that which is throwing your marriage upside down.
A good divorce attorney will look out for legal interests during the divorce process. But we aren’t there every night when you are dealing with the stress, drama, and…fragility of your situation. A great divorce attorney will recognize these other dimensions, though.
While you are going through your divorce, don’t hesitate to seek outside counseling. Look out for yourself first – and this will ultimately help your children. It’s like they say on an airplane…”put on your own oxygen mask first…then worry about your children.” You can’t take care of your children if you are incapacitated.
We want you healthy – not just legally healthy…but also, physically, financially, and most importantly emotionally healthy. If you need to watch more movies to feel inspired…or if you need to watch more movies after you put the kids to bed to escape…then watch ‘em!
But more importantly, please don’t think there is a stigma attached to seeking counseling. There isn’t. To end on a bit of levity…look out for #1…and don’t step in #2!
There are very specific rules governing divorce in Virginia. At Hofheimer Family Law Firm we are committed to providing you with the experience and compassion you deserve and the successful results you need to move on with your life. Request a FREE copy of our divorce guide for women in Virginia, or reserve your seat at our monthly divorce seminar – 757-425-5200.