In a lot of cases, everything is pretty cut and dry—except custody. In a lot of ways, everything else sort of handles itself. And, besides, it’s just money; there’s a certain amount that people will spend fighting over money (usually, only up to a certain percentage of the value of the asset). Though it’s true that some people’s thresholds for fighting are higher, there’s usually a limit to how far they’ll go. Whether we’re talking about real estate, retirement accounts, or spousal support, these things usually resolve themselves after a little bit of time and energy. You’re rarely going to find people who are willing to spend more fighting over an asset than the asset is worth. Right? Makes perfect sense.
Kids, though, are an entirely different story. In cases where custody is contested (meaning that mom and dad don’t agree about how to handle custody and visitation), the cost of those cases can go through the roof—because who can put a value on the kids? Besides, there’s nothing so emotionally traumatizing as worrying about what will happen to your kids—especially if you have reason to believe that, for whatever reason, your child’s father having custody would be harmful to them in some way. When you feel like your children are in danger, or that you won’t have the opportunity to parent the way you believe is best, it can drive you to do all sorts of things.
Of course, most of the time, it doesn’t come to that. Most of the time, parents agree how custody will be handled. Most of the time, there are two pretty good parents who have minor disagreements about how the children should be raised. Most of the time, even though mom is pretty worried at the beginning, things resolve over time and tensions slowly recede. Sometimes, though, that doesn’t happen. Sometimes, custody really does escalate into a full fledged battle and, if it does, you’ll want to be sure you know as much as possible about custody law in Virginia.
Follow these steps to make sure you’re informed and ready to make the decisions that you need to make to ensure that your case resolves as quickly, efficiently, and inexpensively as possible.
1. Request a copy of our free custody book, The Woman’s Custody Survival Guide.
If you’ve never been through a custody case before, you don’t know what you don’t know—and a good way to start to figure things out is by asking questions and getting up to date, Virginia specific information from a source (or sources) you can trust.
Our custody attorneys have handled tons of custody cases, including the most difficult cases—physical, sexual, and emotional abuse, relocation, same sex parents, special needs, and so on. Basically, you name it, we’ve done it. If you don’t know the basics of custody—the difference between physical and legal custody, primary physical and shared physical and split physical custody, how relocation works, how same sex parents are judged, the way special needs children are handled, and the ten all important custody factors that the judge must consider in your custody case—you’ll want to read this book. Like, immediately. It’s full of tons of information that most people (including your child’s father) don’t know, so it’s a great place to start. Request a copy today and we’ll immediately send you a downloadable e book version.
Live in our immediate area? If you’d like, you can request a hard cover copy, too. You’ll receive a second email with a link in it that allows you to provide your physical address, and we’ll get one mailed out to you (in a plain white envelope; don’t worry, no one will know what’s in it) right away.
Not only that, but once you request a copy of our custody book, we’ll give you the option to participate in our free custody e-course, designed to help teach you lots of the tips and tricks we’ve picked up in all of our years of experience. It’s not to be missed.
2. Attend Custody Bootcamp for Moms.
Custody Bootcamp for Moms is an intense, all day seminar designed to help prepare moms for knock down, drag out custody cases. Whether you’re planning on representing yourself, hiring an attorney, or checking up on your current attorney, Custody Bootcamp for Moms is definitely your next step.
It’s a seminar that takes you down to brass tacks, and teaches you, in the simplest way, how custody cases in Virginia are handled—and what you’ll need to do to prove your case to the judge. At Custody Bootcamp, you’ll learn:
• When to sit and stand, and how to address the judge;
• What to wear to court, and how to behave in front of the judge;
• The ten all important custody factors (and how to base your case around them, because the judge has to listen to it);
• How to question and cross examine witnesses;
• How to give opening and closing arguments;
• How to survive cross examination yourself;
• The ins and outs of working with guardians ad litem and custody evaluators;
• And tons more.
There really isn’t a way to overstate the importance of Custody Bootcamp for Moms; if you haven’t attended yet, it’s a must do! The cost to attend is just $197 (which is less than the cost of just one hour with a moderately priced local attorney). For more information, or to sign up to get a free copy of our report, “Can I REALLY Represent Myself in a Custody Case?” click here.
Can’t afford to attend? We do grant one scholarship per seminar. Feel free to apply by sending your name, contact information, and a little background to kcarter@hoflaw.com. Keep the next seminar date free on your calendar (check the date of the next bootcamp by clicking here), because we’ll notify you if you’ve been selected about one week before the seminar. If you can’t make it, we can’t offer a rain check; we’ll have to offer your spot to another candidate.
3. Come in for a consultation.
I know, I know. Nobody wants to come in for a consultation. It makes it all to real, doesn’t it? But avoiding the doctor doesn’t mean you’re healthy; in fact, a situation can fester if you don’t get it checked out. Custody is the same way. Take time now to ask questions and come up with a custom tailored strategic plan for how to move your case forward; you definitely won’t regret it. We won’t push you in any direction, anyway. Ideally, you and your child’s father will be able to work something out—in which case, if you’d like, we can help you draft a custody and visitation agreement. (If not, though, you can work it out between yourselves, and that’s totally fine, too.) If, though, your case ends up escalating, you’ll be glad that you had a chance to ask your questions and get some answers before it all goes south. For more information, give our office a call at (757) 425-5200. We can help you set up an appointment, or get you more information about our books or seminars. We’re here to help, and, for custody, you’re in the right place!14