I have always felt strongly that, when it comes to working and the cost of childcare, it is not the responsibility of only one party to earn ‘enough’ to make childcare ‘worth it’. It’s a shared responsibility between two partners, so the fact that one partner is lower earning is relevant but should not be a determining factor.
There are so many things that stem from employment that go beyond a paycheck – from the fact that you’re generating income towards your own Social Security (especially if your marriage is less than ten years, which is how long you’d have to be married to have the option to take your portion of his or your own), benefits, retirement account savings and just generally the fact that being in the workforce means that you’ll earn more over the course of your career.
Of course, the wage gap exists – to all the naysayers, you are in the wrong place – and it is exacerbated dramatically for women who take a pause in their employment of nearly any duration. It is a break that is difficult, if not impossible, to come back from.
Chances are, though, that you’ve found yourself here – and facing a separation and/or a divorce – and you (and your soon-to-be ex-husband) have made whatever choices you’ve made that brought you to this point, and that may include having been a stay at home spouse for a period of time.
It’s okay. I understand. Raising our children is so incredibly important, and I’m sure that – whatever you sacrificed – you and your husband made a decision with all of the information that you had at the time and you felt it was the best one. I am absolutely not judging; in a country like ours where the wage gap is what it is, where there’s no subsidized childcare and very little guaranteed paid family leave, it is difficult to imagine making any choices other than the ones we made when our backs were against the wall.
The key, though, is to remember that you made a choice together with your soon-to-be ex-husband and now you are both in the same predicament. Well, mostly. Now that you are separated (and maybe divorcing), you are no longer on the same team. Probably he realized this fairly quickly and started encouraging you to seek your own independent employment. If he’s particularly rude, he may have implied that you are a freeloader or a golddigger and all but demanded that you start contributing financially.
Now, though, the question is not whether it “makes sense” for you to work given what you might earn. Now, you are both sort of individually and separately responsible for yourselves.
Let’s talk about how that looks in many family law cases – with special emphasis on women who return to the workforce to find that their pay is lower than they hoped it would be, putting them into “is it worth it?” territory.
Let’s look at a basic child support calculation with two kids, a husband earning $100,000 a year, a wife earning $0 (she’s been a stay at home mom), $150 in health insurance costs for the children only, and $0 in childcare (she’s been a stay at home mom, so there was no need). In this scenario, guideline child support – with mom having primary physical custody – is $1691 per month.
Let’s say, though, that mom goes back to work. She’s earning $30,000 a year – because she took a pause from work and this is what she could get – and the family is paying $1500 a month in childcare, but all of the other facts remain the same. That increases the amount of child support she would receive (again, based on primary physical custody) to $2590 per month.
So, in addition to taking home $30,000 a year, which is some $2500 a month, less taxes, social security, and so on, she will receive $2590 per month in child support. Yes, the $1500 in childcare costs now comes out of that – meaning that the net benefit to her is $1090 per month.
Compared with when she was only receiving $1691 per month – total – this is a significant net benefit and certainly makes raising children, and affording the housing, groceries, and other necessities that raising children involves, a lot easier. Not only that, but she has the additional benefit of whatever other work-related benefits she receives – access to health insurance coverage, the ability to save for retirement, contribute to her own social security, and more, depending on the specific company.
Let’s look at exactly how much that is per month. In Virginia, if she earns $30k a year, she’s likely to pay about $5400 in taxes, meaning that her net income – the amount she receives – is about $24,600 a year. That’s $2050 per month, plus $2590, for a total of $4640. If you subtract child care – $1500 (which husband is paying a portion of because, if you remember, the child support guideline calculation went up when the childcare costs were factored in) – she brings in about $3140 per month.
It’s a lot more than what she would have received if she didn’t go to work.
On the flip side, of course, for the husband, it’s just a net loss. He could have paid a minimal amount – the $1691 – but now that the family has an additional $1500 in childcare per month (again, a shared cost), his guideline child support goes up significantly. Hers – or, should I say, yours – on the other hand, increases.
Sure, you pay your portion of the work related childcare – it’s not a $1500 per month increase – but the net increase to you, each month, in money that you can access and use, plus the additional benefits associated with employment, make a significant difference.
Gone are the days when you had to calculate whether it was worth it to go back to work when you only made $30,000 a year (and have $18,000 a year in childcare expenses). It’s important to look at these guidelines in a smart way so that you can make the best, savviest decisions for yourself and your children.
And if you earn more? Sure, that’ll change the guideline child support calculation – but its generally not a dollar for dollar deduction.
For more information or to get a copy of our custody survival guide for Virginia moms, visit our website at hoflaw.com or give us a call at 757-425-5200.