Do I need a divorce seminar?

Posted on Dec 13, 2019 by Katie Carter

These days, people get information in all sorts of different ways. I was scrolling through Facebook just this morning while I was blow drying my hair, and came across a really interesting article in Forbes about the new ioS 13 update and how we’ll soon be able to protect our private data (like location services) from apps that try to access it in new ways. I wasn’t even looking for it, but it really gave me insight into something new.

I like that. Or, at least, most of the time I like it. Sometimes, it does feel like there’s just a overwhelming amount of information out there, and it can be hard to tell what’s true from what’s not – especially in areas where you aren’t exactly an expert.

If you’re headed towards a divorce, you probably feel overwhelmed. Heck, even though I’ve been practicing here for almost a decade at this point, I can still remember what it was like to learn all of this stuff, fresh out of law school and with absolutely 0 experience. And it wasn’t personal to me, like it is to someone who is preparing to go through the process.

It’s important to learn all you can about the divorce process so that you’re in the best position possible to make decisions. But how do you get that information? What’s the best source of up to date, Virginia specific divorce information out there?

Sure, you can find all sorts of articles on the internet. You can also read comments people post on articles and ads and product pages on social media. You can check out YouTube. But how do you know whether it came from a legitimate source? There are a lot of nameless, faceless internet sources out there. There’s a lot of misinformation. There are also a lot of trolls. It can be hard to navigate that minefield and walk away with any clear sense of what the law actually is, and how it might be applied to your case.

That’s kind of dangerous. I find that whenever someone has just researched on the internet for their particular legal issue that they do one of two things: they either swear that something really really GOOD for their case is true, or they swear that something really really BAD for their case is true. It’s either that they find information somewhere that makes them feel better, or they find something that confirms that their suspicions were correct: they are 10000% screwed.

In most cases, of course, neither is particularly accurate, but, either way, it can be hard to dissuade someone who has convinced themselves so completely of something. A good part of my time is spent trying to make sure that good, accurate, up to date information from a reliable source is available to Virginia women who need divorce and custody related information, so I hate to see and hear when that doesn’t happen.

There are lots of things you can do to make sure that you’re informed, both so that you can help yourself make the best decisions possible, and also so that you can avoid either a false positive feeling of invincibility (which can cause you to make bad decisions) or a terrible negative sense of foreboding (that can really impact your mental health and lead you to accept less in your marriage than you deserve).

Look, you do you. You can take my advice or leave it, but I want to make sure that I at least try to put good information in your hands.

I think it’s good to start out with one of our divorce or custody books.  They’re full of tons of great information, but that might not be the best way for YOU to learn. Some people need more visual input than a book can provide, which we totally understand and appreciate.

That’s why we offer our monthly divorce seminars. I know, I know, it’s scary to think of going to a live seminar about DIVORCE, of all things! What if you see someone you know? What if it’s scary? What if, what if, what if?

Well, I’ve been doing this for awhile, and I don’t think I’ve ever had two people who knew each other before they walked in. It could happen, of course, but… I’ve just never seen it. Also, it’s not scary. It’s just a seminar.

One of our attorneys teaches each seminar, and we teach them on a rotating basis. It’s an opportunity to learn about the divorce process generally, and also to ask questions specifically to that attorney about the things that are keeping you awake at night.

Could we just do a webinar, so you don’t have to come in person? Yes, but the seminar would lose a lot. Specifically, it’d be hard to tailor the program to each person’s specific concerns. It’d also be hard to do question and answer. Though you could get some information, it would be harder to ensure that you got the specific information you wanted when you walked in the door. Also, it definitely gets a little cold and impersonal feeling, don’t you think?

Besides, you’d probably never even watch it. It’s like those online fitness classes. We pay for subscriptions, but does anybody ever really do it? Probably not – or, at least, not as often as they show up for a gym class if they register for it!

I’m not saying you have to, I’m just saying – our divorce seminar is a great source of really good divorce information. Want to learn more? Visit our website by clicking here. Want to talk to someone about it? Give our office a call at 757-425-5200.

Can’t afford it? We accept referrals from therapists, victim advocates, and military support personnel (fleet and family advocates, etc). Have your therapist or advocate give our office a call or shoot us an email at, and we’ll help them get you registered. Hope to see you there!